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February 18, 2012 / becca shayne

Love Story

Back in the day, before facebook was a thing, there were email chain letters. OHHH yeaaahhh remember those? Yep! This one came in on my hotmail account! (yeah gmail didn’t exist then either). Anyway, Thought you guys would enjoy reading this. Enjoy!

> Subject: Love Story – English Class Assignment
> It had been a rough day, so when I walked into the party I was
> very chalant, despite my efforts to appear gruntled and
> consolate.
> I was furling my wieldy umbrella for the coat check when I saw
> her standing alone in a corner. She was a descript person, a
> woman in a state of total array. Her hair was kempt, her clothing
> shevelled, and she moved in a gainly way.
> I wanted desperately to meet her, but I knew I’d have to make
> bones about it since I was travelling cognito. Beknownst to me,
> the hostess, whom I could see both hide and hair of, was very
> proper, so it would be skin off my nose if anything bad happened.
> And even though I had only swerving loyalty to her, my manners
> couldn’t be peccable. Only toward and heard-of behavior would
> do.
> Fortunately, the embarrassment that my maculate appearance might
> cause was evitable. There were two ways about it, but the
> chances that someone as flappable as I would be ept enough to
> become persona grata or a sung hero were slim. I was, after all,
> something to sneeze at, someone you could easily hold a candle
> to, someone who usually aroused bridled passion.
> So I decided not to risk it. But then, all at once, for some
> apparent reason, she looked in my direction and smiled in a way
> that I could make heads or tails of.
> I was plussed. It was concerting to see that she was
> communicado, and it nerved me that she was interested in a pareil
> like me, sight seen. Normally, I had a domitable spirit, but,
> being corrigible, I felt capacitated–as if this were something I
> was great shakes at– and forgot that I had succeeded in
> situations like this only a told number of times. So, after a
> terminable delay, I acted with mitigated gall and made my way
> through the ruly crowd with strong givings.
> Nevertheless, since this was all new hat to me and I had no time
> to prepare a promptu speech, I was petuous. Wanting to make only
> called-for remarks, I started talking about the hors d’oeuvres,
> trying to abuse her of the notion that I was sipid, and perhaps
> even bunk a few myths about myself.
> She responded well, and I was mayed that she considered me a
> savory character who was up to some good. She told me who she
> was. "What a perfect nomer," I said, advertently.
> The conversation become more and more choate, and we spoke at
> length to much avail. But I was defatigable, so I had to leave
> at a godly hour. I asked if she wanted to come with me.
> To my delight, she was committal. We left the party together and
> have been together ever since. I have given her my love, and she
> has requited it.

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